Archive for the ‘Uncategorized’ Category
Due to the fact that half of Westport now knows about this blog (as a result of a certain two or three people), the administrators have decided to make it private for the time being, at least until those responsible are detained, converted into gimps, and kept in cages for an indefinite period of time.
For now, have a little nibble of this text-message exchange between Blanus and yours truly:
Blanus (8:14 pm): What you doing?
Malonedies: Just eating pork, drinking a pork-shake and thinking about porking. You up to anything?
Blanus: Oh hot, I’m doing the same thing but with venison.
– I Love Thanksgiving –
– You Get to Gut the Turkey –
– Play With the Giblets
Here’s one of my favorite music videos of recent times. The song is obviously dope, too.
Artist: Twin Shadow
Here are a few notable text-message conversations between Samsonite, friend of the blog A. Bronzestein, and yours truly.
A. Bronzestein (2:54pm) You losers doing anything for Samsonite’s birthday tonight?
Malonedies (2:56pm) Nah we all planned to ignore his calls and then bash his mailbox later in the night.
Malonedies (4:39pm) On second thought, in celebration of Samsonite’s birthday i’m going to break into his house late tonight wearing a Woopy Goldberg mask, running around wildly, with handfuls of cum, throwing the cum everywhere and screaming like a hyena.
A. Bronzestein (4:41pm) Fuck! We got him the same thing!
A. Bronzestein: I’m tired of this flirting, when will you just be my girlfriend!
Malonedies: Once you man up and start bringing home the bacon
A. Bronzestein: I’ll pick you up Wendy’s baconator burgers every night, then shower you in bbq sauce and sweet n’ sour
Malonedies: Well, I’m really no interested in the whole ‘bf/gf’ thing right now – i’m more interested in master/slave relationships these days.. Like, I’m not trying to get tied up in a relationship with a boyfriend.. I’m trying to get tied up – and whipped – by a master.
A. Bronzestein: Yeah I’m not sure if I could tae on that type of committment, I mean I’m a pretty submissive and easily manipulated little pussy bitch. So if anything I’d be have to be the slave
Malonedies: Goddamn, what’s a bro got to do to find a decent master around here?
Samsonite (1:17PM) We drivin to the citaaay tonight?
Malonedies(1:18pm) I’m gonna give A. Bronzedick a call in a few to ask what the parking sitch is. I definitely don’t want to risk getting a ticket, or getting fingered in an alleyway
Samsonite: Or both… my guess is there’ll be some street parking. Issue is whether we’ll be able to find a spot.
Malonedies: I could ask A. Bronzestein to lay himself out on the pavement and hold a spot for us all day
Samsonite: Tell him I’ll buy him whatever he wants from McDonald’s if he does.
Malonedies: He said it’s a deal: he wants a McRib sandwich with some extra processed possum-anus meat, and extra flavor dust in the sauce.
My favorite scene from Tarantino’s Pulp Fiction:
I want a gimp for Christmas.
This is a video of an event that happened a year ago but was posted on youtube.com about a month ago. This woman named Erica Winchester from Mass. flies off the handle as she tries to give some unwanted mail to her postman. Needless to say the words or some variation there-of: “you fucking theif nigger” comes up in it at least once. Or let’s not forget the, “They’re going to kill you…” “Who?” “The white people…” comment. This also woman co-runs a public speaking agency. There are 2 parts to this video, Enjoy!